These days it feels like hate is the new black, but then I realize it’s old hat and I take a break from the facebook rants and walk away from unproductive conversation. Which abounds in my 120 acre world of Christian campus life.

The saddest part is that I can’t look at them and tell them that “those people” are me and I am still as human as I’ve ever been.

I won’t be able to be “out” just yet. And I don’t even know when “just yet” will be…

And I feel a bit helpless, a bit like someone who isn’t championing the cause of human rights for my fellow lgbt brothers and sisters. I have to be silent to survive. Have to keep my identity at a safe distance from their unraveling hatred.

But this isn’t a “woe is me” post. Nay. It is a looking forward to when I will be able to be the closet proofed person I was meant to be. The advocating voice for all persons, aided by my deep understanding of what oppression looks and feel like.

Until then, I will push through the muck and pray for the people in my life to be filled with a sense of Christ-like love for those they have been directing so much unChrist-like hate towards. I will pray that one day everyone is able to come to the table as equal footed persons dialoguing about how to work together to make the world a better place. I will pray for acceptance and for peace. And all that good, warm, fuzzy stuff.

Coom. Buy. Yah.


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